DEJENNERATE.COM BLOG

OK, so adult novelty sales is not for me
Because one never wants "sold dildos" to end up under "trivia" when one finally receives one's own page on Internet Movie Database. Plus, how much would I really use my employee discount? I only have so many closets. Besides, one too many sex swings would upset my bedroom decor. No, if I sell something, it would be something that doesn't need storage as I'd use it immediately upon receipt. Therefore, I’m going to sell wine.

Yes, really
As of tomorrow, I’ll be a part time wine tasting consultant and can do home wine tasting parties. And as the host of these parties doesn’t actually have to pay for the wine I bring for the tasting, and gets to keep the rest of it after the tasting, there should be no surprise that most of the people I asked yesterday answered a solid “Hell, yes!” to book a wine party. I dare say this would not be the case if I decided to sell, say, Tupperware.

And because I keep promising Maven
to pimp her blog, here it is. I met Maven through Gene’s blog, but I’m not pimping him, because I’m not that kind of girl.

posted by Jenn @ 1:16 PM  

The Dildo Party
I’m going to one of these “adult novelty” home parties this week. Since I’m friends with comics, I go to my fair share of these, as such parties have traditionally been held by budding comics on a quest to get more stand-up material. After all, precious few social gatherings will have a highly repressed soccer mom exclaiming, “That is supposed to fit WHERE?” For those of you who have never been to one, they kind of have the same feeling as when you and your perverted friends go down THAT aisle of Spencer’s Gifts: lots of pointing, exclamations of “what the hell?”, and laments on what exactly is the purpose of a Butt Buzzer.

So last party I attended, my friend turned to me and said: “Why don’t you do this? You totally have the personality for it.” (someone take my Mom to the coronary unit, please). I agree with the personality thing, but you know – while there are many, many life experiences that will make me more appealing to publishers and movie production companies, and whatnot, I’m pretty sure Chief Dildo Salesman is not one of them. There’s just some crap I don’t want coming up in my E! True Hollywood Story.

posted by Jenn @ 11:54 AM  

What I’ve been doing instead of blogging…
Reading Billy Crystal’s book, 700 Sundays (Gene, this explains the Aunt Sheila comment). Just finished it. Very funny and uplifting. If you can’t/couldn’t get out to see his one-man show play that the book was based on, this isn’t a bad consolation prize.

What I will be doing now instead of blogging…
Reading Robert Klein’s book, The Amorous Busboy of Decauter Avenue. Very funny, very witty, and very small print. I expect to need bifocals by the end of the book.

Updates on The Jenn
I’m in limbo waiting to hear from the film festivals. Luckily, I only have two more weeks to wait. I wish I was much better at obsessing. I’ll have to tap into my dear friend Gene for tips on this.

Aside from that, Andrea and I are working on making our good screenplay even better (we’re looking for readers if any of you chaps are interested), I’m working on a horror film with another writer, and I’ve got two of my own screenplays on tap. And the two novels. Yes, there was just one before. Apparently my writing projects are reproducing by mitosis these days. Or my filing cabinets are fucking each other when I’m not home.

But, back to blogging
Now that I have no pressing deadlines, per se, I will be going back to regular blogs. You may now all rejoice.

My friend Kelly
is looking for a catching name for her husband and his business partner’s boat repair business. If you guys can think of anything catchy, let me know. My suggestion, “The Little Men in the Boats”, was deemed inappropriate.

posted by Jenn @ 12:53 PM